Encouraging true Freedom

I have had so much on my heart lately regarding today’s young people.  I want to be able to make a difference in the lives of young people, and I so much want to see other Christian adults have the same desire.   To want to come alongside young people and show them their worth and value to God.  To show love in action.  To take time for them.  To encourage them.  To pray for them.  To listen and be a friend. To let them know someone is cheering them on in life.

Today’s culture is so saturated with worldviews that don’t line up with God’s Word.  Even for those teenagers and young adults who seek to know & follow His Truth, the temptations of the world beckon so strongly.  Media is EVERYWHERE and often the voices speaking to our youth today (sometimes loudly and sometimes oh so subtly) are not ones that encourage them morally or spiritually.

I want to be a voice that does.  I want to see the Church, the bride of Christ, have a stronger passion for not only coming alongside young people as they navigate life, but also set an example for them spiritually, financially, morally, etc.   I so want to convey to young people that Christianity is not about rules and regulations.  It is about FREEDOM.  The instructions that God sets out for us are for OUR benefit because He loves us so much.  Just like any game/sport has guidelines to follow, God created life with guidelines so we could have the best of life.  I wish our young people really knew this, believed it, and lived it.  I see so many who are making choices that are leading to heartache, financial difficulty, and more.  Some are caught up in complications and consequences of choices that they have made.  And the ripple effect extends to others.  Would they have had a different outcome if someone had invested more in them?  Had poured time and energy into showing them that life is about more than self, more than sex, more than instant gratification, more than political correctness, more than the lies society throws at them?  Will we as Christians come alongside them now, in the midst of the mess and teach them about grace and redemption?  Will we teach the youngest of our society the love of Christ and the path that leads to true freedom?  Will our actions create a positive ripple effect for the next generations?  Will they see that we, as adults, are still growing and that they can too?

A Look Back

One year.  One year of changes.  One year of new experiences.  One year of learning a new place, new people, new things about ourselves.

I still remember moving day.  I remember the hot tears that rolled down my cheeks as I held my one month old grandson and watched the movers wrap up our furniture and load it onto the truck.  I remember all the mixed emotions I was feeling as I was about to leave pretty much everything and everyone that I knew.   Feelings of uncertainty, yet excitement.  Feelings that I was abandoning certain people that I dearly loved and yet knowing I was being obedient to God’s will for our lives.  It was all so much for me.  The saying goodbye, the leaving my home of 15+ years, the going somewhere unfamiliar after 3+ decades in the same place.  I remember when we arrived at our destination the gracious ladies who served a meal for us and the movers.  I remember more tears as they prayed.  I was so thankful for their sensitivity and support from the very beginning of us being here.  Our family was a huge help & support as well, taking care of our kids and unloading boxes, helping us get settled in, praying for us…all while knowing how greatly this would affect their lives as well.

In the coming weeks and  months I remember the moments of looking at my husband and asking if this move was really real.  I remember the Skyping sessions that left me longing to be physically present with my family, not just virtually.  (Yet being so thankful for technology that allowed us to see one another).  I remember the moments of shopping and being near tears because of how long it took to find things & wishing to just be able to be back at the PSV.  And of course I remember the tears of my children.  Their hurt.  Their wondering why.  Their wishing things could be different.  Some of those things haven’t changed.

Journaling was a big help to me , on good days and bad days, and I encouraged it for them as well.  Phone calls, letter writing and sending or receiving packages was also a nice way to deal with the change and ‘cope’ with our new life.  One year later it still is.

Even for all the tears and tough times I remember over the past year, today I can say that I am feeling less like a newbie to the area.  I know where to find most of my grocery items at the Kroger store now, the kids are beginning their second season of soccer, I actually run into people I know when I am out running errands, etc. and I have a list of new experiences that I am thankful for since the move.  I also really enjoy hosting company when family can come see us.  It is an exciting time for the whole family when people come to visit us.

I like my life.  Though I don’t blog as often as I used to, I can assure you that I continue the mindset of “Still Growing” and certainly feel I have been in a lot of new ways this past year.  I don’t know what God still has in store for us, but I know He will continue to lead me and walk with me just as He has the past year, and all 30some years of my life.  🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

So Far to Go

Funny how I haven’t blogged in over a year and now I find myself writing for the second night in a row.  Maybe in part it has to do with the fact that I now have my own laptop, and that I haven’t been present with my children the past couple of days.  But tonight it mostly has to do with the fact that I feel God speaking to me and I want to write about it.

If you have a relationship with God, then you know it is just like Him to use various means to get the same message across to you.  Conversations with someone one day, a song on the radio the next, a sermon, a “poster” on social media.  They all are making the same point, drawing you to the same conclusion. God wants your attention on this.

I haven’t taken time to go back and read my archives of years past, but if my memory serves me correctly, pretty early on in my blogging journey I said that I wanted to be transparent with people.  My subtitle of my entire blog says “Realities of my Life”.  Sometimes being open and transparent can be a vulnerable thing to do–especially for a pastor’s wife.

If I am real with you tonight than I would share that I need more of the Holy Spirit leading my life on a daily basis.  In the everyday choices.  I need a closer walk with God.  I need to give Him more of my time and energy that I squander on nonessential things that are not going to make a difference in eternity and aren’t spent to bring Him glory.   I need to minister to others more and share the Good News with more people.

Sunday night my pastor spoke on spiritual health.   Today we attended part 1 of a 3 part series at a retreat which spoke to me.  This evening I finished “Forgotten God” by Francis Chan which has my mind focusing even more on how I have so far to go.  Not in a discouraging way, but in a motivating way.  I don’t want to stay where I am and I believe God doesn’t want me to either.

But then I think about the reality of what it means to move from where I am into more of what He wants.  And I think about total surrender.  I think about what sacrifices that might mean.   The cost of discipleship.   And I wonder..how ready am I for total surrender?  How is my spiritual health?  Does my walk reflect the “talk” of what I say I want in my relationship with God??

I think it is important for us to reflect on these things and be able to answer them honestly.  I also think it is important for us to remember that He is strong in us when we are weak (2 Corinthians 12:10) and that His grace is sufficient for us (2 Corinthians 12:9).  I am thankful that God sent the Spirit to walk with us–to dwell IN us. To bring us comfort but also conviction when we need it.  I am so glad for His patience since we as believers are sometimes slow to mature.  May my heart be His and my days be more led by His Spirit.

Are you needing to take a look at your spiritual health?  Are you straddling the fence or just going through the motions?  Do you want your life to look different?   You aren’t alone!!   I believe God is waiting for you to call to Him for wisdom and guidance and grace in these areas. That’s good news!  The God of the universe who created the sun, the moon and the stars created us too and cares about each one of us and our spiritual health.  Together I pray that we can keep our eyes focused on Him and keep growing!!

Reflections of Change

It’s been almost a year since I have last blogged.   But tonight I am sitting in a semi-quiet house thinking of the changes in my life over the past year and decided to type out some of my thoughts.

I have blogged before about change. How sometimes we choose change in our life.   How other times it seems thrust upon us like an unwelcome guest.  But no matter what the change, I believe there is opportunity to not only learn and grow from it, but also to thrive and flourish.

Last February my husband and I learned we were going to be grandparents.  A lot of change followed in the coming months as we prepared our home and hearts for this addition.  With summer came more change…God’s leading for us to relocate.  Sooo many changes within that one change.  Leaving friends, family & our home…leaving our new grandbaby.  Leaving all that was familiar and comfortable.  It’s been nearly six months that we have been in our new home and I still have so much to learn.  About the area.  About living away from my parents and my best friend.  Holiday schedules have changed.  My kids’ opportunities have changed.  Grocery shopping has changed.

Yet through it all I can see God at work.  I know He is growing me-on the inside.  He is growing our family.  I am trusting Him to do His good work in me right where I am with all the changes that have happened since I last blogged.   And all the changes yet to come.  Another grandbaby coming in May.  New ball teams for our kids.  Different summer experiences.  I know some of these things are going to be very bittersweet.  But I know He will walk with me each day and that I will still be growing each step of the way.

Me Being Me, You Being You

My life is different than your life.  And that’s ok.  We are all made to be different, with various talents and personalities.  God created us to use our gifts and talents for Him and to complement one another.   We all have different hopes and desires for the future, different expectations of the present, different issues we struggle with, different people our lives overlap with.  Different messes we make.  Different habits and patterns.  We are not meant to be the same.

I am writing this today mostly for myself.  I need to know & remember that being different from others is ok.  My life and my home don’t need to look like anyone else’s.  Maybe you need this reminder too.  I often struggle with comparison and focusing on my weaknesses instead of all the beautiful qualities God has given me.  I worry that I post too many statuses and blog posts about the same stuff over and over and people will get tired of it.  And they might.  Because they are different than me.  And that’s ok.  I am relational.  I am very open with my feelings (sometimes too much so).  I put myself out there, yet I analyze whether people like me or appreciate who I am or if I sound stupid with what I say.  I want to be fun to be around.  I want to be a good friend.  I want so  many things in life.   Mostly though, I want to be who God wants me to be.  I want to be the best version of myself.  I need to embrace the mistakes and learn from them, and thank God for my strengths and continue to flourish in them.  I need to admit my weaknesses and ask for help.  I need to rest in Him.  I need to be ME bravely (thanks MOPS).  I need to keep growing!!

How about you?  Do YOU need to take a look at YOUR beautiful qualities and thank God for them?  Do you need to remember that you don’t have to look like the celebrity on the cover of that magazine (or the mom in the pew a few rows up who has it all together including the perfect hair and makeup)?  Do you need to be transparent with yourself?  Take a look at who you are, who you want to be, who God wants you to be.  Look at the areas you desire change, and allow HIM to transform you.  A moment at a time.  For however long it takes.  Just keep growing!!

Stopping at “be content”

So, it has been a long time since I’ve blogged.  And when I say a long time, it’s been long enough that I hardly recognize my site for all the changes it has went through since I last logged in.  I am not sure if I can even get to the page to tell me when my last ramblings posted….I will find it though, I’m sure.

It’s now 2015.  Twenty three days in to be exact.  For about another 7 minutes.  So by the time this actually posts it will be the 24th.  Nearly done with the first month of the new year.

I am not one to make much of any kind of resolutions for each new year, but I sometimes set a few goals. (Maybe you consider that the same thing:) ) I can’t even remember how many “goals” I wrote this year, since I just was basically free journaling about all the stuff I’d like to see different.  I started with things like “be a better teacher” and “get better organized” and “blog more” and then I stopped after I wrote “be content” as one of my goals. I just couldn’t seem to make my pen write anything else. It seemed ironic to me that following a list of all these things I wanted to change or be different in 2015, that I would follow that with “be content.”

As I reflected on that a bit further I realized that I desire to be content no matter what my life circumstances.  Such as noted in Philippians 4:11 as well as other New Testament passages.  Not that I need to be content with unhealthy eating or exercise habits, or be so content with where I am spiritually to just stagnate and not mature.  But to be content in the daily stuff of life even when it is hard or I don’t like it.  Even when I am discouraged and disappoint myself when I don’t see much change or meet my own expectations of myself. Even when circumstances beyond my control make me want to take the defensive.  Life is hard and messy and we have so many different struggles.  We go through seasons of life.  Seasons of change.  My hope is that through it all I will try to work on finding contentment because of the hope that is within me. I also hope that no matter what the season or struggle of life, it will find me still growing.

PS–now that I am finished I see the little box that says I am using the new editor.  And the option to switch to classic mode.  Go figure. 🙂

Haves & Have Nots

Comparison. I hate when it rears its ugly head in my heart. I do it FAR too often when it comes to measuring aspects of my life. While I’d like to say that it is not so much in the material sense, I would probably be wrong. In truth, it is often me measuring my performance against my own ideas of what is appropriate or good, or how others do things. But if I look a little closer, it is often about haves & have nots.

I have been so inspired by some great books I have read recently, in which the point is made about how RICH Americans are compared to so many other places in the world. When I let that sink in, it makes me feel like I should be doing so much more than I am for those who are less fortunate. It makes me realize all that I have & all that I waste. It encourages me to change some things about the way I live my life. How I need more simplicity. And gratefulness.

Then there are days that I hop on Facebook to see what my friends, family, former coworkers and other acquaintances are up to. And I see the pictures of vacations we can’t take. I see familiar faces standing in front of historical landmarks or beautiful beaches hundreds of miles away. And I wish. I compare. I think of what I am missing out on or what I am not able to “give” to my children. Ugh.

I wonder if I looked into the eyes of a mother in a poverty stricken nation, who can’t provide food for her children each day, if I would be worried whether my kids ever got to “meet” Mickey Mouse. Would I hold a malnourished little boy or girl in my arms & be thinking of whether my little ones will ever get to see the ocean?

I like the days that I choose focus on what’s important. Eternity. When I take my last breath it won’t matter how many states I have visited…how many vacations I have taken…how many “fun” experiences I provided for my children. Did I love those around me with Christ’s love? Did I show compassion? Did I live out the Great Commission? Did I do my best to teach my children to follow God — to love & serve Him with their whole heart? Did I give them experiences in serving others?

I am sure there will still be days that I desire to take my kids to the see the ocean & enjoy fun experiences together. But I pray I will always keep things in the right perspective. No matter the haves or the have nots.

Kids Will Be Kids, Right?

Ok parents, raise your hand if you’ve ever had one of your children disobey you. More than once. In the span of one minute. Still have your hand raised? Yeah, me too.

I often tell my husband that if he would pick any one area of my responsibility list that I could probably devote myself full time to just that area. It feels true to me at least. Currently I feel that way about character training with my kids. We all know parenting itself is a full time job — taking care of our kids & meeting their needs. Spending time with them. But it goes so much beyond those things. I am desiring to rely on God more and more for the strength and wisdom I need to be more consistent & focused on training them to be obedient, responsible, hardworking, trustworthy and the like. It is going to take time, patience and dedication from me. But I believe it will be well worth the time, sweat and tears. (Mine– and maybe theirs too.)

I am sure you’ve heard the phrase “Kids will be kids”. And while I understand it to an extent, the older I get, the more I feel that this phrase is used far too often to excuse behavior that is unnecessary and inappropriate. I want to have better expectations of my children because I know they are capable of making good choices. What happens if we as parents just say “Kids will be kids” when our children misbehave, and one day we wake up to “kids” who are pre-teens & teens who have little to no respect for authority &/or don’t have good character? If they know right from wrong when they are young, but get away with inappropriate behavior a little bit here and there because “kids will be kids” what will they learn from that?

My priority as a parent is to teach my children the truth of God’s Word & how to love, honor, & serve Him with their whole heart, to the best of my ability. God’s Word says “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.” Proverbs 22:15 KJV Kids may be kids and have foolish notions, but it is my job as a parent to correct inappropriate behavior, not excuse it. One of the first verses our children learn/memorize is found in the first verse of Ephesians chapter 6. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.” It is actually one of God’s commands, so we are teaching them to obey Him as they obey us. How can they learn to obey Him if they are allowed to disobey us/other authority with no consequence for their actions? Even once in awhile? (Unless you are specifically teaching them a lesson on grace, and not just ignoring the behavior)

I wonder what would happen if Christ followers would throw up their hands and say “Sinners will be sinners”. If we, who are called to be fishers of men, didn’t share the hope of Christ’s redemptive work on the cross but instead watched the people of the world stay in their sin. Or watched new converts flounder & fall & give in to temptations because that’s just the way it is, we can’t really do anything to help them or teach them a better way. High standards & expectations are too much. After all, no one can be perfect, and little white lies & such aren’t really that big of a deal right? Well, considering Jesus himself told the woman caught in adultery to “go, and sin no more” (John 8:11 KJV) I wonder if we should feel differently? He didn’t tell her to go and only do small sins once in awhile and that would be ok. Sin separates us from God & the wages of sin is death. (see Isaiah 59:2 & Romans 6:23) Romans 6 tells us we should not continue in sin so that grace can abound, and that we should not serve sin or let it reign in our body.

My kids are eternal beings who will one day have to choose where their loyalty lies/who they are going to live for. I want the best for them! I believe there is more for them than mediocrity & halfhearted obedience. I want them to learn from a young age that there are consequences for their actions. Positive ones & negative ones, depending on what their choices are. Lifelong ones even. I have great expectations for them, and believe that if they can learn early how to have good character, it will be beneficial to them and to others throughout their life. Sometimes it is tough though. It is hard to see them miss out on something fun because they chose to disobey. But to me an obedient spirit is more important than temporary fun in the long run. And God’s Word teaches that “to obey is better than sacrifice” I Samuel 15:22 KJV.

I understand people fail — I am one of those people. Many times a day. It is why we desperately need a Savior who not only cleanses us from our sins, but also walks with us through the daily grind of life, and gives us strength to overcome, even when we mess up. I want my kids to know that — throughout their lifetime. They are going to make mistakes. Sometimes often. And there is forgiveness. But for me, bottom line — I must be diligent because I believe kids can be taught (and sinners can be saved & have victory!). And imperfect Christians like me can grow. Always.

How Many Televisions Did YOU See Today?

So many thoughts going on in my mind tonight, I had to take a few minutes to blog. But even as I type that, I am not even sure where to begin. My mind is swirling with thoughts of our culture and what it is today, where it is today and how we as Christians are to live in the day & age that we are in. I have been so aware lately of how television has invaded the public realm. I can’t seem to go to the doctor’s office, a restaurant, the bank, or the local pharmacy without there being a television on. Can we as people not even go 10 minutes without news, HGTV, sports & other misc entertainment to fill our time? In my home I am a fan of very limited television usage. It sucks our time that could be better used in other ways. And certainly it becomes a distraction when I am sitting in a waiting room wanting to have a one on one conversation with one of my children, or read him/her a story and there is this flashing box drawing attention away from the human interaction at hand. Sometimes it is my attention, and sometimes theirs. And sometimes it isn’t something I even want my children exposed to. (Like some of the magazines and advertisements in our faces even at the local grocery store.)

Today I purchased curriculum for our upcoming school year, as well as other supplemental materials that drew my interest. Scanning through some of the items I purchased got me pondering how far we have come from Biblical standards. I feel this immense desire to seek out what God truly desires of His people for such a time as this. I need to feel challenged, convicted and inspired … I need to ponder all these questions & thoughts running circles in my mind. Isn’t it so great that we continue to learn and that our values can continue to change as we mature spiritually? I am so thankful for a God who is patient with me & who wants me to grow! (no matter how old I am getting!)

Tonight, I will continue to seek His wisdom in life, in parenting, and in teaching my children what they truly need to learn. I want them to know how they can live for Him regardless of the messages coming from world around them that tell them lies. ..whether that message is coming from a kid down the street (or in the pew next to them), a picture on the front of a magazine, a book in the library, or something on one of the many televisions we encounter during our everyday activities.

A final thought to leave you with that comes from the Word: “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.” Romans 12:2 KJV

What are You Leaving Undone?

Tonight I am surrounded by things left undone. Several dishes waiting to be washed (though not nearly as many as we would have if we hadn’t implemented a “Dish Duty” schedule a couple of months ago), bags filled with birthday gifts waiting to be unpacked and put away, papers to be graded, books to be read, and oh the laundry. But what am I doing instead? Blogging (obviously).

I am drained. This has been an incredibly busy week. For a family of 7 pretty much every week can be labeled a busy week, but this one was extra busy. Extra work hours for me (I hate deadlines), family day activity (March’s–we are almost caught up!), MOPS, a field trip, a birthday, and today’s packed schedule with a mother/daughter banquet at church, a birthday party with extended family for our middle daughter (whose birthday is next week), and a piano recital for our 2 oldest girls this evening. And trust me when I say I am leaving out some details! I don’t want to do anything at 10 thirtysomething at night except sit. And do something I enjoy. And probably go to bed early. (right after I get my secret sister’s Mother’s Day gift ready for church tomorrow since I know it’ll stress me out if I wait til morning…and lay out the kids’ clothes for morning….and pack the diaper bag & anything that we’ll need to take with us straight to the restaurant after church …. and, well, I’m guessing you probably understand!)

Do you have things left undone today too? Are you feeling drained? Whether it’s kids, work, household responsibilities, or other commitments, we all can get to a point of just needing to stop and sit. Breathe. Relax. Fall asleep. Leave some things undone. As long as they are the right things to leave undone. But what about the things that are undone in your life that shouldn’t be? Have you taken a look at your relationships lately? With family members, friends, kids, coworkers? With God?

Even though we know we aren’t guaranteed tomorrow, I believe we still can get comfortable with the idea that we have time and that nothing really is going to happen to us. So we leave things unspoken that need said. We let things go that we should take care of. We think we will restore good relationship with God or others another day.

This week I turned 35, and I have had somewhat of a hard time with it. I know some may think that it’s silly for me to feel that way, and I won’t go into all the reasons why I am struggling with it (maybe another blog another day), but I have been doing a lot of reflecting on my life up to this point & also thinking about my future from here. I don’t want the important things in my life to be left undone. Life is full of change & surprises & unexpected happenings. We need to treasure each day & make it count. And only leave the not-so-important things undone as we keep growing.